User blog comment:Darkusaurus/Brave Frontier : Grand Gaia Codex/@comment-25002135-20140605054013

Okay, finally finished reading this.

I have to say, I quite liked how you started the story; but then as the story went on, I noticed that you like to clip a lot of sentences and end up ending them a bit too early. It makes reading the story quite fragmented at times; perhaps you could fix that or get an editor to look over your work? idk.

With regards to the opening, though, that fragmentation actually works better in my opinion, lol. Just not for the rest of the story.

Anyway, overlooking that minor flaw I'm liking the story so far. Not much has happened yet, but i think the pacing is good so far. Keep up the good work! I look forward to see what else you write.